It has been 3 ½ years since I have sat down and updated this blog of which I had all these grand plans for. Consider this a welcome back, a hello, and a glimpse into my odd little thoughts and actions. I will try and keep up a little better, and will update folks through Facebook when I do get around to writing on here.
If you have not read my previous postings (all two of them), I figure that this would be a good time to share this lil’ tidbit with you……I like the dirty words. There, I said it. For all of my family and friends that held me up on a pedestal and thought of me as a pristine piece of art that was as pure as the driven snow, I apologize. I blame my siblings for all of the negative aspects of my life. They were most definitely the ones that led me astray. Horrible people, my siblings, avoid them at all costs!
This August is a welcome month. Not only because of the fact that I have decided I am going to give this blog thing another spin around the dance floor, but because my wife and I are going to have another grubber. Baby Reese is now 8 days overdue and is not starting out on a good foot. Our oldest child, wise old sage Hannah, thinks that Reese should be put on a timeout upon birth due to her tardiness. Maybe the purpose of these last 8 days were for us to feel an anticipation for her arrival rather than the dread and eye-rolling that went along with knowing we were going to be having an unexpected shit factory that will prolong our world of diapers, drool, and debt for another 3 years. It must have worked, because now I am anticipating her arrival. I find it hard to think of anything else than the feel of a warm bundle on my chest, the smell of talc and clean baby clothes, and little tiny hands grabbing onto her father’s finger. I am sure I will write more about her after she decides to leave the comfort of her body fluid spa and enter into the mayhem of our family.
Welcoming is not the only thing happening this month. Sadness and goodbyes are looming towards the end of the month as well. Both my sister, Faith, and my best friend, Shawn, are moving away from me this month. I figured I would take the next couple of paragraphs and share with you a description, story, and a little history of both of these people in my life. If you know either of them, it is obvious how much they mean to me and how much they are going to be missed. The following words might seem like a roast of them, yet it is much more than that. It is an homage to what they mean to me.
Faith is old and has been in my life longer, so let’s start with her. I have always been one that takes the hand that I am dealt with and runs with it. Faith, on the other hand, is always looking for another draw. Faith drew another hand a couple of years ago and went back to school to get her Masters in Education. Jobs seem scarce now that she is a teacher and she accepted, obviously with no concern of how I would feel, a teaching position in Waldport. She is moving, along with her family, on the 22nd of August.
For the first 18 years of my life, I was Faith’s toy. She read to me, taught me how to spell, dressed me up like the sister that she wanted, made me gay for a couple of years, and was the best possible friend a lil’ shit like myself could have. She was my mentor, my confidante, and an inspiration. I will leave out the part where after the first 18 years, she became critical, overbearing, short-statured, slightly crippled, cross-eyed, and a complete pain in my ass. That being said, I will still miss her more than she will ever know and wish her all the best in her new adventure.
Shawn, my best friend since elementary school is leaving me as well. It seems that his wife has taken a job in Austin, Texas and did not ask me how I would feel about her uprooting the friendship tree that Shawn and I have been growing for the past couple of decades. That is pure selfishness, I say. She, my friends, is evil in an adorable little package (Just kidding, Charity….or am I?!?). You know how they say that every girl needs an ugly girl to hang with to make them look better? That is Shawn to me. I don’t mean that Shawn is uglier than I, he just does not come across as very bright and it makes me look like a pure genius when standing aside each other. He is the Gilligan to my Professor. Lack of knowledge is not the reason for Shawn’s idiot appearance; it is the goofy smile that never leaves his face, it is the laugh that echoes through a theater embarrassing all who are in attendance with him, it is the fact that he opens his mouth and words fall out before he has a chance to take a gander at them (He once asked a couple of Chinese guys the correct way to pronounce Hiroshima.). Some may look at him as a goofy, balding, and waist-expanding redhead, but I see him as my best friend that I have shared some really damn fun, dangerous, goofy, and exciting times with. Shawn, I will love you until the umiak flies into darkness, till the stars turn to fish in the sky, and the puffin howls at the moon.
What a weird blog entry to have as my first one in a long time. I swear that I will hone them as I go. I just feel that this can be a great place to share my family stories, my take on cool shit that I find, some self-deprecating humor, and etc. Thanks for looking.
